Summary

DON'T PARK THERE!

Source Archive Films by Getty Images
Title: DON'T PARK THERE!
File Number: AFP-17A 16mm; VTM-17A Beta SP
Color: B W
Type: Silent Comedy
Year: 1924
Subjects: Aerials
Description: B W 1924 Country bumpkin Will Rogers ("Jubilo") needs some linament and it's only a short drive into town, but parking? That's a different question, as he finds out in California, Seattle, New Orleans, Texas and Salt Lake City, the longest trip into town any man ever made. He can't drive, either. Will's car is a Model T Ford. 00:00:19:00 B W 1924 MS Screen black, iris reveals Will Rogers (herafter WR) in Chico Marx like felt hat bucks as tho riding a bronco. 00:00:31:00 B W 1924 WS WR riding a circular saw or sander by tree before house the sander careens & gyrates wildly. 00:00:36:00 B W 1924 CU WR's legs & feet working sander-saw by pushing on wood. 00:00:39:00 B W 1924 WS WR tips sander up again, continues work. 00:00:47:00 B W 1924 MS WR gets off saw & goes out. 00:00:55:00 B W 1924 MS WR enters side house, lifts saddle from wall, exits 00:00:59:00 B W 1924 MS WR puts saddle on sander, mounts, continues working. 00:01:10:00 B W 1924 WS WR on sander, it flips him off, he falls forward. 00:01:12:00 B W 1924 MS WR lands by wall of house in ragged clothes. 00:01:16:00 B W 1924 WS Man etners, they talk, WR rises, puts jacket on, both leave 00:01:22:00 B W 1924 WS Older couple by wagon, she touches his aching back, WR & man approach them, man lifts sack on wagon, WR talks w them 00:01:31:00 B W 1924 MS She has paper in hand, orders bottle of DOANE'S HORSE LINAMENT from WR. 00:01:38:00 B W 1924 MS She hands WR order for linament. 00:01:39:00 B W 1924 WS WR w whip & reins in hand, young woman in checked dress, hat nearby closes his coat, kisses him, WR whips horse. 00:01:45:00 B W 1924 WS Wagon exits, losing some of its load, old couple, girl, man all wave to WR, bend to pick up last load. 00:01:49:00 B W 1924 WS Wagon rides off thru open gate. 00:01:59:00 B W 1924 WS Wagon going down road full of cars 00:02:06:00 B W 1924 MS WR moves wagon along road. 00:02:09:00 B W 1924 MS 2 well-dressed drivers in open car yell. 00:02:10:00 B W 1924 MS WR drives on, yells back. 00:02:12:00 B W 1924 MS Driver yells, one rises. 00:02:14:00 B W 1924 MS WR yells back. 00:02:19:00 B W 1924 MS WR in wagon. 00:02:20:00 B W 1924 WS Wagon straddles road shoulder as cars pass it. 00:02:29:00 B W 1924 WS Cars going up & down, train to left, wagon comes up middle as cars turn before, WR stops. 00:02:35:00 B W 1924 MS WR stopped, looks around for something. 00:02:40:00 B W 1924 WS Cafe front. 00:02:44:00 B W 1924 WS WR moves wagon. 00:02:46:00 B W 1924 WS WR parks wagon, exits. 00:02:52:00 B W 1924 MS WR takes rein, ties it around pole by cafe, looks around. 00:02:59:00 B W 1924 WS Truck drives, wagon's tied to it, WR tries to untie it. 00:03:05:00 B W 1924 WS WR grabs reins, walks by horse, makes way for cars. 00:03:11:00 B W 1924 MS Car full of people behind stopped wagon. 00:03:17:00 B W 1924 WS Black frame, sign: SEE CARS amid road. 00:03:19:00 B W 1924 WS WR climbs on wagon & drives off. 00:03:25:00 B W 1924 WS Traffic jam, WR amid it, crowd watches from sidewalk. 00:03:33:00 B W 1924 MS WR standing next to horse, takes reins, ties them to sign, drivers yell at him, he looks confused. 00:03:43:00 B W 1924 WS Traffic moves slowly as he ties reins to pole. 00:03:46:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman hands driver paper, then sees WR. 00:03:48:00 B W 1924 WS Traffic jam. 00:03:49:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman runs to WR, bawls him out for blocking traffic. 00:03:55:00 B W 1924 MS WR & policeman talk. 00:04:00:00 B W 1924 MS They discuss, WR extracts something from pocket. 00:04:07:00 B W 1924 MS Car backs out, another car drives forward, knocks wheel off 3rd car. 00:04:10:00 B W 1924 WS Traffic jam, hens fly. 00:04:12:00 B W 1924 MS Hens fly knocking police cap off, policeman exits, WR exits, driver laughs. 00:04:17:00 B W 1924 WS Crowd flocks to pick up errant hens in between cars. 00:04:20:00 B W 1924 MS 2 women in car back seat, hen lands on old one's hat, she grabs it off & tosses it away. 00:04:29:00 B W 1924 MS Hen lands in front seat by black chauffeur, he stuffs it in his jacket. 00:04:36:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman approaches sign, exits, people grab hens. 00:04:39:00 B W 1924 WS WR crawls out from hiding under car, hen under arm, tries to cross street, traffic's too busy he gives up, sits on back bumper which starts to move forward. 00:04:54:00 B W 1924 WS Car backs up to curb, WR falls onto sidewalk, rises w hen. 00:05:00:00 B W 1924 MS WR looks at hen, crowd giggles. 00:05:03:00 B W 1924 WS Traffic jam, people exit cars. 00:05:05:00 B W 1924 MS WR talks to hen. 00:05:11:00 B W 1924 MS Crowd laughs at WR & hen. 00:05:13:00 B W 1924 MS Corner of Ford dealership, sign: FORD LINCOLN. 00:05:16:00 B W 1924 MS WR sees car store sign, talks to hen & walks out. 00:05:20:00 B W 1924 MS WR walks to Ford window (traffic reflected), looks in. 00:05:35:00 B W 1924 MS WR talks to hen while looking at car store window, exits. 00:05:40:00 B W 1924 WS Pedestrians & WR pass entrance, WR looks in, salesman walks up & invites him in, he enters. 00:05:56:00 B W 1924 WS Ford gate w pedestrians, WR drives out wildly & away. 00:06:02:00 B W 1924 AV WR swerving down road. 00:06:05:00 B W 1924 MS WR's POV dodging cars, swerving down road. 0 00:06:16:00 B W 1924 CU Hen on car seat. 00:06:18:00 B W 1924 MS Montage: WR swerving, hen on car seat. 00:06:35:00 B W 1924 WS Policeman & child by mailbox, boy points to street. 00:06:37:00 B W 1924 AS Cars in orderly line drive towards camera, traffic moves smoothly. 00:06:38:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman & boy. 00:06:39:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman mounts motorcycle, exits. 00:06:42:00 B W 1924 AV Traffic, pedestrians. 00:06:45:00 B W 1924 MS WR piles car into one in fron to "park", 2 drivers get out. 00:06:54:00 B W 1924 MS 2 drivers talk, policeman approaches, WR blames other guy. 00:07:01:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman hands WR ticket, other policeman joins them, WR pockets it & turns to car. 00:07:12:00 B W 1924 WS Crowd of men lift WR's car off other car. 00:07:16:00 B W 1924 MS WR looks at his car, now lifted off other one. 00:07:18:00 B W 1924 WS Car backs up, drives off. 00:07:21:00 B W 1924 MS WR gets in his car, exits as crowd watches. 00:07:24:00 B W 1924 AV WR approaches parking space but someone beats him to it. 00:07:32:00 B W 1924 MS Empty parking space, 2 cars enter, driver gets out, WR backs up, drives off. 00:07:43:00 B W 1924 WS WR tries & fails at another parking space. 00:07:47:00 B W 1924 CU Tire, headlight. 00:07:49:00 B W 1924 MS WR & car w locked fenders, WR gets out & goes to driver. 00:07:53:00 B W 1924 MS WR & driver talk, driver points to tire, WR bends, looks. 00:07:58:00 B W 1924 MS Driver grabs WR from behind, throws him from fender, dusts off hands, pushes up sleeve, bends down. 00:08:04:00 B W 1924 WS Driver lifts WR's car off his & shoves it. 00:08:49:00 B W 1924 CU Will Rogers (WR) puts hen in back seat, pulls paper from pocket, leaves. 00:08:54:00 B W 1924 MS Woman gets in car w man. 00:08:57:00 B W 1924 CU Exhaust pipe from couple's car catches rear fender. 00:08:59:00 B W 1924 WS WR, leg over car door, pulled out of parking space as couple backs out. 00:09:00:00 B W 1924 WS Couple, WR amid street, car approaches & stops. 00:09:03:00 B W 1924 MS WR & man talk from cars, WR points to problem. 00:09:08:00 B W 1924 WS Couple pulls away, leaving WR free, he pulls off, 3rd car moves. 00:09:13:00 B W 1924 AV WR looks for parking space again, turns amid street, tries for another space, someone gets it, tries for a second one. 00:09:24:00 B W 1924 CU WR pulls up, parks, looks in backseat, rises, policeman enters, points out hydrant on curb. 00:09:25:00 B W 1924 MS WR, leg over door, talks w policeman. 00:09:37:00 B W 1924 CU Fire hydrant. 00:09:39:00 B W 1924 CU WR's face asking if a fire's planned. 00:09:44:00 B W 1924 CU Policeman's face denying fire likelihood. 00:09:49:00 B W 1924 CU WR asks to stay. 00:09:57:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman gives WR ticket, WR apologizes for not having business card to give in return. 00:10:13:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman & Will talking. 00:10:14:00 B W 1924 WS Policeman motions WR to move, jumps back, WR drives off. 00:10:19:00 B W 1924 WS Cars moving on tree-lined road past lamppost. 00:10:20:00 B W 1924 WS WR driving down middle of road. 00:10:23:00 B W 1924 CU Policeman starts motorcycle. 00:10:25:00 B W 1924 WS Policeman pulls out from sidewalk into traffic. 00:10:26:00 B W 1924 WS Policeman moves away down road, rounds curve. 00:10:36:00 B W 1924 WS WR goes to Oakland, California since there wasn't parking space in Ogden, Utah passes bridge, house, rural trees, drives up to traffic cop. 00:10:40:00 B W 1924 MS WR asks policeman where he can find a parking place. 00:10:44:00 B W 1924 CU Policeman's face, finger to lip, scratches head, thinks of one he heard about in San Francisco last week. 00:10:55:00 B W 1924 CU WR listens, nods. 00:10:56:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman exits, WR exits. 00:11:06:00 B W 1924 WS WR drives off, policeman continues to direct traffic. 00:11:11:00 B W 1924 MS WR in San Francisco w many policemen all giving him tickets. 00:11:19:00 B W 1924 MS Policemen crowd around WR demanding he bone up on car laws. 00:11:27:00 B W 1924 MS Policeman points. 00:11:28:00 B W 1924 WS Policeman hands WR car regulation book the size of a telephone book, WR thumbs thru it. 00:11:36:00 B W 1924 CU WR looking at car law book: "ALL SCHOOL CROSSINGS". 00:11:38:00 B W 1924 CU "ORD.28632 WHEN TURNING A CORNER FOLLOW ONE WHITE ARROWS". 00:11:43:00 B W 1924 CU WR promising to learn traffic laws w in one hour. 00:11:53:00 B W 1924 CU WR puts book down. 00:11:55:00 B W 1924 WS WR drives forward from line of policemen who nod approval & begin to disperse. 00:12:00:00 B W 1924 WS WR weaves into traffic on broad street w trees, building, traffic, WR does figure 0's in the intersection - wobbly circles. 00:12:08:00 B W 1924 AV Intersection w 9 pivot points & painted arrows, WR careens around disorientedly. 00:12:13:00 B W 1924 CU WR stares down at confusing arrows. 00:12:19:00 B W 1924 CU Blur of bround & arrows whizzing around. 00:12:22:00 B W 1924 MS WR swerves around, stops, swaying dizzily. 00:12:28:00 B W 1924 MS Montage: dizzy POV, cars, storefronts rolling & pitching. 00:12:39:00 B W 1924 MS WR talks to himself & hen. 00:12:46:00 B W 1924 WS WR backing down road in S-curves. 00:13:02:00 B W 1924 WS WR drives, dog runs past. 00:13:07:00 B W 1924 MS WR parks car. 00:13:08:00 B W 1924 WS Drugstore. 00:13:10:00 B W 1924 MS WR smiles, backs out of parking place. 00:13:15:00 B W 1924 WS WR stops at firehouse, fireman runs out, says "move!". 00:13:19:00 B W 1924 WS WR moves, fire engine rolls out. 00:13:21:00 B W 1924 AV WR drives, fire engine behind, past large house, trees. 00:13:24:00 B W 1924 WS WR drives, fire engine swerves to pass. 00:13:27:00 B W 1924 MS Fire engine, firemen shake fists, swerve. 00:13:30:00 B W 1924 MS WR driving. 00:13:33:00 B W 1924 WS Fire engine driving. 00:13:38:00 B W 1924 CU Behind WR, he turns to query firemen. 00:13:45:00 B W 1924 CU WR turns back, talks to firemen. 00:13:50:00 B W 1924 WS 2 motorcycle policemen parked prepare to get moving. 00:13:55:00 B W 1924 WS Policemen ride towards camera. 00:13:58:00 B W 1924 WS 2 policemen ride past other 2 who mount their cycles too. 00:14:03:00 B W 1924 WS WR turns left, policemen follow, fire engine goes straight on. 00:14:10:00 B W 1924 WS WR driving down city street crowded w traffic, streetcar, man on horseback crowd, traffic cop. 00:14:20:00 B W 1924 AV Busy main street: cycles, cars, streetcar, tall buildings. 00:14:27:00 B W 1924 WS WR turns corner onto streetcar tracks. 00:14:29:00 B W 1924 WS WR stops, gets out to chase escaping hen, traffic comes up. 00:14:40:00 B W 1924 WS Policemen surround WR's car, onlookers approach & gape. 00:14:42:00 B W 1924 MS WR moves thru crowd looking for hen, smiling. 00:14:47:00 B W 1924 WS WR chasing hen, crowd watching. 00:14:50:00 B W 1924 WS WR approaching back of car w top down, sees feathers, grabs hat, large black woman jumps up from back seat, grabs hat, crowd gathers, laughs, woman dons hat. 00:14:58:00 B W 1924 WS Hen walks in between streetcar tracks. 00:15:00:00 B W 1924 MS WR exits, crowd laughs. 00:15:02:00 B W 1924 WS WR chasing hen down streetcar track, crowd behind. 00:15:04:00 B W 1924 MS WR walking bent over, hand out to hen, streetcar right behind, WR scoops hen up by grill, sits, straightens leg. 00:15:07:00 B W 1924 WS Streetcar stopped, WR rises, tips hat, exits. 00:15:14:00 B W 1924 WS Huge crowd moves to reveal WR's car, stopped traffic. 00:15:33:00 B W 1924 WS WR driving forward down dusty road. 00:15:44:00 B W 1924 CU Hen on car seat. 00:15:46:00 B W 1924 CU WR's face commenting on trouble he's had w the chicken. 00:15:55:00 B W 1924 WS Parking space by drugstore, people look in windows. 00:16:02:00 B W 1924 WS WR pulls up to space as another car approaches, he drives over sidewalk & into store. 00:16:05:00 B W 1924 WS Drugstore INT, tables, woman at table, customers, WR drives into drugstore & stops in middle, scattering tables. 00:16:07:00 B W 1924 CU Car shakes, WR turns it off, picks up crutch, gestures. 00:16:14:00 B W 1924 CU Frightened ratty-haired man rises from behind counter. 00:16:18:00 B W 1924 WS WR in car in soda fountain, counter man approaches. 00:16:23:00 B W 1924 MS Counter man stands by WR who finally orders the linament. 00:16:28:00 B W 1924 MS Salesman looks, listens, declares product 20 years obsolete 00:16:36:00 B W 1924 MS WR depressed slumps in car seat. 00:16:47:00 B W 1924 WS WR driving on country road tire and fender fall off Model T jalopy, then the entire car falls apart. 00:16:54:00 B W 1924 CU Tire drives over large nail.
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